Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Watching Airplanes.

I don't know what I want to do in the next year. I just want to explore :) I feel like lately i've been hanging out watching grass grow and airplanes fly across the sky. I haven't really done much. What a way to waste life. I am going to start living :) I am finally 18. No curfew. Gambling. Tobacco. Voting. Porn. No "parental guardian signature here __________" bullshit. First credit card. I'm an adult :) It's time to learn. I wish i could just be knee deep in the water somewhere. But unfortunately i'm stuck here for the moment...just gotta make the best of it. The first change i'm making is the stuffie addiction. I'm going to continue the blog of stuffies until i have no more to post. Just no more new ones. Pandora is in now :) Next change is my hate towards everyone. I am going to try to be nice. I am sick of obsessing over hate. I need to forget all i know and relearn. I need to get hate thoughts out of my head and start respecting.

Friday, September 23, 2011

I guess I forget to update

I got another bunny :) He's a netherland dwarf, brown and black and so cute. His name is Pibble. Him and Snyper would make the greatest pair because they're both insanely hyper, but Snyp get a bunny boner around Pibble. I'm hoping once Pibb gets his bunny balls Snyp won't be a horny beast around him haha. I really want a Holland Lop bunny, but my boyfriend says I can't get anymore since they're staying at his house. I was thinking that would be his birthday present because he wants one too, but I would rather not make him super pissy on his birthday. So that's just gonna wait til we have our house and he can get his Holland Lop and I can get my Lionhead. Weeeee

I wish I could work my 44 hour paycheck :( I can work about 15 hour paychecks with this stupid school schedule. I wish the business was open later. I could soooo do like 3-10 everyday. That would rock!

I don't think I'm ever going to invest when I grow up. I'm doing a virtual stock exchange in my economics class right now, and I've lost over $1000 dollars. Grrr. My teacher said if we gain any money he'll add 10 pts, and if we lose money he takes away 10 pts. I am thinking my grades going to be a 90. Ahh lame.

My eye has been twitching for litterally a week and it's driving me insanse. Just thought you should know.

I turn 18 in a month and I know what tattoo I want. I'm getting the whole top of my foot leopard print. Then I'm gonna get Corinthians 13:4-6 tattooed on my back soon after that.

I have sooooo much to do before December, then I have even more after January. Senior year is expensive and stressful.
HILARIOUS!
BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

—— Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Stressed!!

I hate the dentist! In a week i find out if i have cavities and if i do i might die. I dont know if i should get a shot or just gas. Grr.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

http://national.citysearch.com/profile/35597733/loveland_co/colorado_colonics_inc.html?publisher=mobilizy (Discovered in Wikitude) near

Whoaa.
Wikitudeeee

School soon.

Yay I get to use my planner! Woooohoo. Dentist on the fourth. Blehhhhh. I seriously will die if I have to get another one of those horrible shots. I hopefully have a job, though :) At the cooporate offices of good day pharmacy. I'm waiting for the results of the background check (hopefully they overlook my misdemeanor), and then I have a job! I've been stressed lately because I feel like all my sites aren't being updated and blahhhh. I'm going to go do that now :)

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Snyper!

I got my bunmy yesterday! Hes a 6 week old New Zealand Red. I named him Snyper because hes hyper :D


Friday, May 27, 2011

Just so everyone knows...

I learn this from my sister: Skintight means as tight as skin. Skin is modifying tight.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Summer

It seems so close!! I have the rest of this week, and next week's finals. After that, I'm free. I will be a senior, officially. What should I do this summer? Suggestions, please :)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Marriage.

Isn't that a big enough word to make you close the page?
Or do I really have to write my feelings on here, and get all mushy?
I think we'll BOTH pass.


Wife says to husband: "Whisper dirty things into my ear". Husband leans in and whispers: "Dishes, Laundry, living room"


On another note (to get the hell off the topic of marriage, because it needs to be off my mind)

siht gindear er'ouy fi toidi na er'ouY (now read it backwards) 

Did you not see the word "Shit" when you first read this? haha

Think: if you were on a deserted island, what one item would you bring?
How come no one ever says a boat?? Der duh derrrrr!
Anything else is just about as pointless as a white crayon.

I love the way Veruca (sp?) Salt says "squirrel" on the new Willy Wonka, whatever whatever movie. :D

Redneck word of the day - Coffee: My granddad's got a cold, and every time her tries to coffee wets his pants.

I'm allergic to tickles. I break out in giggles.

I suppose the economy really sucks; today I saw an empty turtle shell with a foreclosure sign taped to the side.
I was riding a horse yesterday and fell off, almost got killed! Luckily the Walmart supervisor saw and came over to unplug it.
I'm on a mission! The magic leprechaun told me to follow the pink racehorse to the rainbow where the orange elephant is holding my skittles hostage
ghewttttttttt   <--- my attempt to type with my chin :D
Guess what? I'm naked under all these clothes!
I am going to buy two fish one called 1 and the other one called 2 so if 1 dies I've still got 2!
Once your pants catch fire, the fact that you're lying becomes less important.
I wonder why its called a walkie talkie, yet a vacuum isn't called a pushy sucky?
I'm amazed that you can hold your nose and hum at the same time. Ha Ha! You can't! Comment if you tried this!

Changing things up: Sitting on the TV watching the couch.

My imaginary giraffe got taken hostage today :(
But on the bright site, Dory taught me whale today :) 
I learned today that writing is like going to the bathroom. At first you have to, but then you do it because it feels AMAZING! It's also like sex (sometimes). It feels great at first, then it gets boring, then eventually annoying. My teacher says it's like prostitution. No Joke. First you do it for love, then for a few close friends, then for money.
I've decided that the next time I get caught doing something really bad, I'm going to pretend I don't speak English...or any other language you know. *Click Click Clock Tick. Then if I really get caught, I'm going to tell them the rice crispies told me to do it.
I've discovered today that the only way you can look is forward. Since your eyes face that way. 
Have you noticed that M&M's have W's on them now?
I noticed a giant blue kangaroo on my couch today, and it had bubbles! Where did it get the bubbles? I WANT SOME BUBBLES!!
Remember not to eat pineapples! Spongebob might become homeless. :(
I found out why buffaloes can't fly! Everyone keeps eating their wings.
In honor of Easter: if chickens ate nothing but marshmallows, would they give birth to peeps?
Ya know a good way to mess with your neighbor? Buy the same TV as them. Therefore you have the same remote. Then you can change their channels.
Let's play rock paper scissors. Ready? Rock. Paper. Gun. I win :)
BTW! It's FRIDAY!! Oh sorry, just practicing :)
I wish I was a glowworm. How could you be unhappy if your butt glows?
Think about it: Is that dollar bill in your pocket the same dollar bill that was once in a stripper's pants? 


P.S. I didn't lose my mind, it got taken by penguins wearing blue jumpsuits. 

Can trees grow bugs?

I SWEAR! Theres a tree that grows a lot around here, and the pods grown from the tree have seeds in them, and the seeds have 1 bug in them. No, it's not an egg that a bug laid. No no. Its seriously grown from the tree. I can't figure out what they're called, maybe you know? The picture above kinda looks like the pods, but I am not sure if it's exactly them. Take a look, yo.

Convincing my boyfriend that this tree is a fountain of life was an impossible task. He insists that theres a single egg in every one. Or that the bugs get in them when the seeds are soft and young. BS! There's no way the same type of bug gets into every last one of those seeds. This tree is like a miracle tree. Maybe if we somehow connect dead people to it, it'll sprout them to life!! YES!

Friday, March 18, 2011

These words

Life

Aggravating. Iridescent. Beautiful. Menacing. Annoying. Fun. Delightful. Exasperating. Sad. Bothersome. Sparkly. Timely. Disturbing. Cannibalistic. Confusing. Killer. Expensive. Wasteful Thinking. Headaches. Memories. Turmoil.


Let these words teach you a lesson about life.
You'll move on.

Monday, March 14, 2011

New ways to eat soup.

Attn:
New ways to eat soup being introduced to society.

To Whom It May Concern:

Spoons are no longer legal here in the Milky Way. Any liquids to wish to scarf down are to be eaten with sponges. Fun-shaped sponges make meals exciting!!


Sorry for the inconvenience (not really),

Beasties


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Mustache March

I've noticed that the parenthesis in this font are quite extensively rounded! I guess it just makes a very happy smiley face, or very sad. :)

Anyways! It's MUSTACHE MARCH and all you germs better be sportin' those staches! A man named Jon Paul from my Sunday Funnies Tattoo bowling league enlightened me about Mustache March. Him and his dad were prepared for the month-long event beforehand. Jon Paul's friends and family say he looks like a rapist, but if you pulled up a picture of Luigi, they'd be twins! I was a bit disappointed in his father, for he was not wearing a mustache. He had a goatee. It's not Goatee March, gosh.

Greek Flavor

Man! Have you tried Greek yogurt?! Not a single spice or fruit can be put in it to make it half way delicious. It's disgusting. Since when is yogurt supposed to smell like cheese and taste like rotten, heated cheese (or sour cream)?
<<------YUUUUUUCKK!

In chemistry, I learned that atoms give off light when they have energy they need to get rid of. Then doesn't that make sense that light DOESN'T come from space, that it comes from the atoms in a light bulb? 

Don't you hate it when your stomach makes a gurgle or a squirting sound in an extremely quiet environment? Then you feel it coming up and either your throat gurgles or you burp uncontrollably? Ugh. 

I'm going to make a cake this summer. EPIC cake. That's what I'll name it :) Its going to have this cool strip stuff that is leopard and zebra print. Then cupcakes with fondant, cake crispies, lots of sprinkles, and exciting frosting. 


Does anyone know if ilovetuneup.com works? I would like to purchase it (yes,  I'm OCD about my ipod not being perfect), but I don't know if it will actually work. Let me know!

Got a cool question? Post it as a comment :) I'm just ITCHING to know what your brain finds confuzzling! 

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Define "skintight" please

Does the word "skintight" mean tight on your skin, or tight as skin. The world may never know.

In my attempt to find a picture for this posting, I searched "skin" on google images, and found a baby penis, a diagram of a woman's breast, a girl with a carved back, and whatever THIS is...